People have a lot of questions! How can I help, How are you feeling, Are you nervous, What do you need....
The list goes on. I don't know the answers, I don't know how you can help because I don't know how to help myself. I'm kind of nervous but mostly I just want to get it over with. I feel like I need to just get it over with. Maybe I just need a new brain. Do you have one that you can spare?
By far the hardest question to answer is how are you feeling. This question makes me a liar because I almost always say Oh I'm fine or I'm having a good day or when I feel guilty about being a liar I say I'm tired. I don't want to be a liar, I teach my kids not to lie but it's just easier to sweep the question under the rug. I do not like the truth about that question. It's not that I don't feel loved by you all or cared about it's just that... UGH. There is no easy way to say I fell down the stairs trying to quickly get the sick dog outside and ended up laying in a puddle of my own vomit. Before any of you say "Why didn't you tell me" think about it. Is that something you would want to tell people? It's embarrassing and if any of you ever bring it up to me in person I will act like I have no idea what your talking about. Surgery is on Friday, I can claim amnesia on that incident, right?!
Vomiting, falling and questions aside I am doing good. I choose to be happy everyday and have so many things to be thankful for. It's not always an easy choice but it's the choice I make!
